Matthew 10

I have been drawn to the book of Matthew since arriving here in this country, especially Chapter 10.  I will explain more about that reason later on, but today as I was reading through it my attention was brought to some different passages.  And then my reading was further reinforced after reading a chapter out of the book, "Radical", by David Platz. 

Specifically, chapters 6-8...Go rather to the lost sheep of Israel.  As you go, preach this message: "The kingdom of Heaven is near."  Heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse those who have leprosy, drive out demons...freely you have received, freely give. 

     Jesus' disciples were given this order.  This passage doesn't describe anything anyone in their right mind would want to seek out and do.  It sounds dirty, risky, dangerous, unhealthy, inconvenient, unsafe, scary...It doesn't describe any type of immediately rewarding service.  What spoke to me in this passage is that I feel very much like this adoption and where we are at right now and what we are doing is what I would call 'less than glorious.'  It is easy to get caught up in all the smiling pictures of Blake, the emotions of us 'saving him', the idea that we are doing something good--a euphoric sense.

Which that is great and all.  But, there is so much more.  And we all know that.  Which would explain why there are so many orphans...right?  We would much rather, myself included, be called to work that is convenient, less risky, close to home, less taxing, less time consuming, less sacrificing, less involved.  But what I see here is that God doesn't call us to that, nor does He promise it will be any of these things.  But He does promise that the reward is great to those that seek a life of following Christ, which may involve mingling with lepers, providing medical care to those with HIV, adopting children in foreign countries with many health and behavioral issues, serving meals at homeless shelters, moving to an inner city to do missions...giving up our American dream comforts.   

I can say all this, because that was me not too long ago.  That was me.

Each day that we step foot into Blake's orphanage I pray that God will continue to change me.  Here I am Lord, use me.

In the door we go, and I am met by joyful, happy, curious children asking "Mama?"  "Papa?"  Their hopeful eyes and pleas just rip down into my soul.  They squeeze my legs, pull on my hands all in an effort to get my attention like they are pleading their case, at a tryout, vying for my affection in any way they can--in hopes to be chosen.  I give as many hugs, kisses, squeezes, and smiles as I can in an attempt to be their mommy for a brief moment, for fear that may be their only glimpse of that relationship.

I ask, "How can this be, Lord? Why?"

I do know we live in a fallen, sinful world and this is part of the repercussions.  But what I also know is that many of us are not "going to the lost sheep."  We are not answering the call.  We would prefer to live comfortably, without faith, like there is no God.  We wouldn't proclaim it loudly from the streets because we would look crazy...but the way we live our lives screams it. 

You may say, "I will never be called to do something like Jesus' disciples, something so dangerous, so risky...I couldn't do that. I can't give up all these comforts and conveniences, that is just not for me."

Be careful. These are the people Christ calls...

You might just find yourself in another country, surrounded by lost people, living in dire conditions, with few amenities, having your heart broken by the cries of the orphans.

**Quick update: We have court Friday, Nov. 4th at 11:30 am. Pray that everyone shows up and the judge is favorable toward our adoption of Blake. This is a week later than we were originally told so we will be in this country a week longer than planned, but we are confident this is God's will and timing for us.  After court Jerad and I both will be returning home for the 10-day wait so Jerad can return to work ASAP and I can squeeze and love on the girls.  I will return to Blake's country the following week for our Gotcha Trip!! 

Hello??

Resting..

Peek!

Earrings!

Daddy is so funny!

I'm going to get you!!

Let's play a game of "hit mommy with the rings!"

Starting to like this trick now!

Another picture?