Saturday, December 3, 2011

Blake's Perspective...Part I

Blake says:


"I'm still not totally sure what has happened to me the past few weeks...I sometimes stop and wonder where I am at, I will look around at my new house and my mommy and daddy and my sister's and realize it's not like where I used to live.  I will cry sometimes, for no reason, just that I miss hearing the language I've heard for the past 2 years, that I miss my friends who I slept, ate, and played with everyday, and for the familiar faces and routine.  Then I remember that if I just cry and hold my arms up in the air, mommy or daddy will come pick me up and hug me.  I always smile really big when I am picked up.  It's so nice to know that someone will notice me crying and will come console me and make me feel better.  I'm also realizing that it's okay to cry, even loudly, because someone will respond...it's not a useless act any longer.  And it feels so much better to cry it out, then to hold it in all the time like at my old house--at least someone acts like they hear me and care about me now.  I love the feeling of being in my mommy and daddy's arms, I'll lie my head down on their shoulder and just soak it all in, but I am still a little nervous sometimes, I will lift my head up and look them in the eye just to see if they really do care and if this is okay.  

My schedule is a lot different now.  My roommate, a round little screechy girl, who screams and cries all the time usually wakes me up in the morning.  Not exactly what I would have picked for an alarm clock, but at least mommy usually comes in quickly to remove 'her' from the room so I can catch a few more Zzzz's.   After I roll around in my crib, rock my head up and down a little bit, and bang my head on the railings to try to wake myself up, like I have the past 2 year's, I remember that all I have to do is let out a little yell or cry or mumble something like "mamama" like my crazy roommate does, and mommy comes running.  It seems to work really well for her so I've been trying it out...kind of nice.  I'm actually starting to realize I don't have to do all that stuff anymore, like banging my head, to make myself feel better.  I still catch myself doing it when I wake up in the middle of the night, but it's becoming easier to relax the longer I stay here.  Mom always comes in the room when she hears me if I do wake up at night, and she will scratch my back and speak softly in my ear, it feels so good.  When she rubs my back I cannot even keep my eyes open...it puts me right back to sleep.  Man, this is what I have been missing the past 2 year's.  Now I know why my buddy Joshua never came back to see me, I wouldn't give up missing a night of these back rubs either!  It's almost my favorite part of the day, next to mealtime.  Now that gets me excited.  I'll tell you more about that tomorrow...it's time for a snack now, come to think of it. Mamamama."


7 comments:

  1. AWWWW!! Adorable!! I love your daughters perspectives, too!!!

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  2. beautiful beautiful beautiful xxx

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  3. Oh, sweet, sweet post!

    -Beth in Atlanta

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  4. I bet your kiddo will be so pleased that u bought him via a corrupt system (international adoption) and that he has no contact with his homeland!! I

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