Friday, April 10, 2015

How We Road Trip

With 3 "littles" the packing and prepping for a road trip, even just overnight, is a longer process than the actual trip lasts.  I find myself preparing for the preparation to leave.  It's a process, for sure.  An organized chaos, if you will.

Here's a quick list of what goes through my mind when I am preparing for us to leave.
1)  Crap!  Now I have to do the laundry, and actually fold it.  Can't live out of the laundry basket on the road.  (although it's crossed my mind a few times)

2) I suppose while I'm at the laundry I should throw in some towels..and that reminds me I should probably wash the pee-pee covered sheets I threw 2 towels over in the middle of the night after a 3 a.m.wake-up call to this occurrence and my sleep-deprived quick-fix. 

3) Now to the electronics.  Where are all the freakin' cords to charge them all?  And which cords go to which electronic device.  IPads, LeapPads, iPods, Kindle, DVD Player...cell phones...

4) Which leads to headphones...I can only take so much "Call Me Maybe" and "Let it Go" played out loud...let alone the off-key, not realizing how loud you are singing chords ripping through to the front seat from way in the back.  So headphones for everyone.  Problem solved.  Sometimes even headphones, used as ear plugs for mom and dad, when the DVD players, books, snacks, toys, and IPads wear off the last 30 minutes of the trip and screaming and crying ensues...

5)  Snacks.  My bottomless pits. NEED. snacks.  But I have to put some thought into this after previous mishaps with snacks.  No suckers.  Blake hates suckers. Last time we tried a sucker in the van...he threw it over my seat and it stuck in my hair.  Talk about a ratty, sticky, ANGRY mess...also, no chocolate.  Autum likes to savor her chocolate.  From her chocolate beard, dripping down her chin to the last melted drop running down the side of the booster seat and chair, all the way to the floor-in a nice stained mess.  No nuts, chex mix, sweet and salty, seasoned anything...because that smell is enough to make me puke and dust every inch of my van and myself in seasoning powder.  Nothing like showing up to your destination smelling like the "Salt and Vinegar and Black Pepper family." So bland, no sticky, melting, smelly food.  Cheerios.  Popcorn.  Tortilla chips.  Apple slices. Things I can sweep up off the floor no matter how crunched into the carpet it gets.  Those kind.

6)  With the snacks, comes wet wipes.  Trash bags.  One for trash.  One for puke.  Because I have been known to need a puke sack after turning around in my seat 6, 578 times to settle fights, pick up dropped snacks, type in 400 parental control passwords, change DVD players, refill water cups, sniff bottoms to see who pooped or peed or just a stray gas bubble.  Or just give a simple "COME TO JESUS MEETING" about zipping our lips and simply asking why no one can simply go to sleep...seriously, why do my kids NOT sleep in the car???

7)  Then pack bags.  I have learned to do a bag check after I've already packed the bags.  Sometimes even twice.  After getting to grandmas and Leah forgetting to pack her panties.  Or getting to a motel and Autum decided to unpack her bag and redo it herself, only packing 3 pairs of panties and 4 dollies...nothing else.  I have made it a habit to pack the bags, zip them up, and place them in a high place until we leave.  And rechecking them before we load the van, just one more time.

8) Then drinks.  Sippy cups all around.  I don't care if you are almost will drink out of a non-spillable cup with a lid.  No one will know you are using a baby cup.  It will last longer because you will have to slurp it, so be glad you have something to drink and stop complaining.  I promise I won't post any pics of you slurping your sippy cup of water.  No milk, don't even ask.  No. No. No.  We all know the stench of those cups found a week later under a seat.  Bleh.

9) And for some reason I always pack a book for myself, or a magazine.  To which never gets touched.  Usually just spilled on or a few pages of it are used for toilet paper during an emergency roadside stop to poop.  Hey! Better than giving up my sock.  Just saying. 
I feel like I pack it as a hope...a glimmering hope that someday my kids will entertain themselves or sleep, or be able to type in their own parental control passwords (ha!) so I can read in peace...and not have to sacrifice page 19 for emergency situations. anyway, just a few thoughts on this beautiful thing we call vacation...

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