Thursday, May 22, 2014

What A Day

Yesterday was exhausting. 
Mainly because it was one of those crazy days.

It started with the idea to buy a stupid baby pool.
It's hot. 
The kids are bored.
And the sprinkler lost its excitement by 1 pm.  So why not?  Make a quick run out to Wal-mart. 
Fill up a pool. Endless hours of fun.  And I could possibly get the baskets full of clothes folded, that had been sitting in the living room for 3 days...

I should have known.
We get to Wal-Mart.  Pick up a few things.  Which required us to walk back and forth across the place 2 times.  By the time we get to the front, there are 400 people in line and 2 checkers.  So we just get in line and wait...hoping they can ring up the pool at the cash register.  While I work to keep the 2 little's from pulling every possible gadget and gift card off the display cases conveniently placed at their eye level...Blake proceeds to let off some gas.  And it is stinky enough to cause some heads to turn...and Autum to ask, "Mommy, you poopy?" 

Well, what seemed like 45 minutes later...and some waving of our hands and dramatic nose plugging by Autum...we survive Blake's stink, while trapped between carts and impatient people.  Somehow, someway, Autum discovers she has a blister on her foot from her flip flops...and it reaches a level outside of her standable pain threshold apparently...because she begins to whine...then moan, then yell and finally scream, "My foot is on fire! My foot is on fire! I need a band-aid...Mommmmmmyyyyyy!  OUCHYYYYYY!!!"

Me, a little slow, not sure what is happening, picks her up and calms her enough for her to tell me what her problem is...
Well, crap.  Now what. I don't have a cart.  We are stuck in stink-ville...and Autum has concluded she can't walk.  And I'm not even sure if I'll be able to buy a pool at this register.

We finally get up to the front and thank God...we can ring up the pool at the register.  The cashier informs me there is only one left.  So I say we will take it.  I am to pull up to the lawn and garden center and load it myself.  Just be sure to show my receipt.

Easy enough.

I get everyone in the van. Blake needs a diaper change.  Autum's foot needs doctored. Both are crying.  So I hurriedly pull into the pool area. I see the pool we bought.  I lower the seats in the back of the van. Confidently walk over to load up the pool and come to the stinkin' realization that the pool is TOO...BIG...for the van.  It is 6'...and my van is not.

Well, crap.  Now what?
I drive around the parking lot twice.  Analyzing my options.
Jerad is gone.  Out of the state. With the big truck.
I have 2 screaming, tired kids, who will hit a whole new level of angry when I tell them we can't swim in the new pool.
I don't know anyone to help.

So I'll just call Jerad. And I headed home. Maybe the little's won't notice. 

So I tried to play up the idea of the sprinkler again when we got home.  Hoping it would distract them enough for me to figure out how to get that stupid pool home.  I put the kids in their suits and I put on mine...we head out back to do something, not sure what, but something with water, by God!

It then dawns on me, Blake has a home visit from his Head Start teachers in 5 minutes....
I run inside, change my clothes...and decide to just leave things a this point, I did not care.

We walk around the side of the house just as his teachers are knocking on the door.  About that time, I smell Blake...again.  STINK!

I rush him upstairs to his bathroom, determined he will finally poop on the toilet.  I leave him up there, crying.  I return to floor level to talk to his teachers.  Autum goes up to check on him.  I hear some shuffling around upstairs but just ignore it...trying to rush through paperwork so his teachers' don't have to stick around too long.  About that time, the doorbell rings, Jerad's friend showed up with a truck to get our pool (YAY!)...I get him the receipt.  Turn around and see Blake run down the stairs, butt naked...with just his swim shoes on...while Autum is chasing after him...trying to pinch his "boy parts."  They are both laughing hysterically.

I grab his arm just as he is about to streak through our meeting...yank him up the stairs and put him back on the toilet.  Quickly run back downstairs...and try to proceed with meeting like all is well.

Oh my gosh!!  

...we finally got our pool. After confusion about bar codes not matching.  The kids swam all night.  Mommy had a few glasses of wine. Blake never went #2 on the toilet.  And we all went to bed early with final prayers for supernatural favor for Thursday.

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