Friday, March 2, 2012

Craft Morning through Blake's Eyes.

I woke up late this morning and was greeted at the dining room table with a mess.  A mess of colored paper, this gooey, sticky purple stuff in a stick that the red-headed girl kept licking off of her fingers, these black sharp-pointed things that mommy kept taking out of the crazy chubby girl's hands, and a box of crayons.  I wasn't really sure what all of this was about, but the red-headed girl kept getting more excited with each lick of that purple glue stick.

I just wanted my breakfast served and I would be happy.  Mommy was running around everywhere.  She would run to the kitchen to see if my Gluten-free peanut butter muffins were done, then she'd run to the table to cut up so more banana slices per my screaming, then she would chase the chubby girl around the kitchen when she would run off with her cooking utensils, then she would come show the red-headed girl how to stick some papers together...and then back again.  So at the least it was chaotic.  Which is the norm around here.

Well, things were rolling along just fine. I was chomping on some warm bread, the red-headed girl was glueing her paper into something Mommy called an Easter basket...who knows?  All I know is it requires a LOT of glue based on amount the red-headed girl was using.  Swipe the paper. Lick the fingers. Swipe the paper. Lick the fingers.  Hmmm...have to try that out sometime.  Must be tasty.  The chubby girl was sitting on Mommy's lap coloring some paper.

Then...I ran out of food and my grunting wasn't getting Mommy's attention, so I threw my milk glass across the table.  That got some attention!  The lid flew off and sprayed milk on the red-headed girl's gluey work of art.

Whoa Doggies! She. was. mad!!  Mommy wasn't too happy either.  She grabbed a towel and begin to wipe up the mess and throw away soggy paper.  She grabbed me out of my chair and made me clean up the mess and pick up my cup.  I've learned that when Mommy says "clean up", it means pick up my mess.  I hear that a lot these days.  Anyway, the red-headed girl started yelling something at me saying I was in big trouble.  It sounded something like "yada, yada, yada."  In her haste she threw one of those crafty gluey colored paper baskets my while I was waiting for Mommy to get me more food, I decided to tear the handles off the blue and green basket.  The paper tore so easily, and made this really cool "rrriiiip" noise.  So I did it again, working my way around the basket.  I got a few pieces ripped off before the red-headed girl saw what I'd done.  She started yelling, telling me I was going to be put in time-out (not sure what that means), and that I couldn't have a snack and that I wasn't going to get to play outside, and that I'd have to take a nap, and that I couldn't have any playdates....and the list went on and on.  Sounds like she's heard this list before...
I took a gander over at chubby girl, because she was being unusually quiet in this whole bout, and she was busy chewing away on the red-headed girl's favorite pink sparkly crayon.  She had the whole top of the crayon pretty much chewed off and was working on the paper before Mommy saw what I saw.  She quickly grabbed it out of her hand and scraped the rest out of her chubby cheeks...and then the screaming began.  In her anger she took a sweep at everything on the table and knocked the new black scissors off the table on Mommy's foot...that must have hurt based on the word that came out of Mommy's mouth...

That sounded more like the chubby girl I was used to hearing.

As Mommy attempted to regain control, she muttered something under her breath about 'stupid idea', 'crafts', 'mess' and 'lots of stress...'  She got me one more slice of peanut butter bread so I would quit standing up in my high chair and tried to help the red-headed girl get her demolished basket glued back together.  I shoved all the bread in, washed it down with a glass of milk, realized I had too much in my mouth and spit it all back out down the front of my pajamas.  (which should have been caught by my bib, but I proceeded to remove it while I was waiting for seconds to be served) So Mommy took a big breath, swooped me out of my chair and stripped me down to my diaper.  It made it easier to climb up on the dining room chairs to be closer to the 'crafting' action, anyways.  Here is how it ended up...
She's always upset.  This time it wasn't because of me at least.
The basket with the missing top.

All I know is I hope we don't have a crafting morning again anytime soon, it made Mommy do a lot of heavy breathing.  Hope she is okay.


  1. This is funny. Your a good momma I can tell you try so hard the kids are very blessed to have you!

  2. Messes make GREAT memories! You are an awesome mommy! Have a GREAT GREAT weekend!