Operation: Get that Boy has Begun!!

So we left Tuesday afternoon out of Wichita, KS to arrive in Lugansk, Ukraine about 5:30 pm Wednesday evening.  We skipped the train this time and flew directly into Donetsk and had a taxi driver drive us the 200 Kilometers to Lugansk.  This took about 2 hours, there was a lot of traffic last night and no street lights. 

Anyway, we quickly settled in last night with no sleep for the past 24 hours we slept well.  This morning we awoke bright and early to drive to Blake's birth city to acquire his birth certificate.  We were warned this part of the process in this region is the most difficult.  Our poor translator, Violetta, was met with a gruff, angry voice stating that they were too busy, there were lots of baby's being born, and to come back some other time.  Violetta patiently took that advice and sat down outside the office door with my mom and I.  She said she would wait a little bit and go back in and ask again.  Sure enough, she went back in the office told the lady we were Americans wanting to adopt a child their country did not want, that we were doing them a favor, (as well as a few other things I won't share on here), and things started to move.  We walked out of the office 2 hours later with a birth certificate that stated Blake's new name and listed Jerad and I as his parents.  It was so awesome to see it in writing, finally!  Upon there, Sasha's (our facilitator) wife, drove us and Violetta back to Lugansk to retrieve Blake's social security number.  Again, the two people in charge of this process were gone..but thanks to a lot of prayer and "good luck" according to Violetta, we were able to walk out of there with social security number in hand--only an hour later.  In this country, there are no appointments, there are no guarantees, there are no secretaries who fill in for their bosses...it's sort of an all or nothing kind of deal.  So we planned to go and do a lot of waiting today with no guarantees we would get anything done today...which we did, but not nearly as much as I had planned.  Again, God went before us and prepared the way.  We even got done in enough time to go see Blake this afternoon.  He got to meet his "Mimi" for the first time too.

He recognized me as I was hoping.  He was sitting up in his crib looking out the door when I walked in.  He saw me and it took a minute...then he lunged forward in his crib to stand up, as I walked in he raised his arms up in the air wanting me to pick him up.  His eyes got SOO big!!  Warmed my heart. I think he grew tired of my kisses by the time we left there, though.  Just couldn't give him enough--2 week's worth of making up for!

As it looks now, we will go to the passport office at 9 am tomorrow morning.  From there we will get his passport and buy our plane tickets to leave here and head to Kiev.  We found out there are no flights leaving here to Kiev until Monday morning...which is fine.  We decided to stay here through the weekend, anyway. I know my way around here better and feel more comfortable here.  Violetta said our "Gotcha Day" will be tomorrow!!!  WHOOHOO..can't wait!  Now to go 'baby-proof' the apartment for a weekend of fun.

More to come later.  Please continue to pray for our process to continue to follow in God's plan and favor...we are planning Blake's medical appointment at the US Embassy for Monday/Tuesday.  We hope to get his Visa Tuesday afternoon and fly back to the states, Wednesday.  That's our plan, though, as many of you know, nothing follows a plan here.  So pray that our desires can be met.

 

 

It's crazy to think tonight could be his last night in the orphanage...FOREVER!!!!

Operation: Get that Boy!!

Ahhhh! I have goosebumps writing this post because today I will be jumping on a jet plane to go get our little boy and bring him home for good.  What an amazing journey this has been so far...and it is not over yet.  We have about 4-5 days of paper chasing once we arrive in Ukraine which all has to fall into place for us to be home Thanksgiving day.  So we have a few prayer requests that we are asking you to lift up for us over the next week...

First and foremost: For God to be glorified by our words, actions, thoughts, and attitudes.  For God to instill a Spirit of patience as we trek through many driving miles, paper chasing, red-tape, and signature writing.  For a Spirit of peace as we are unaware of what obstacles we may run into, what situations may arise, and what we have no control over.  As well as a spirit of peace, comfort, and guidance for Jerad and the girls while they are at home.  For a Spirit of healing for me as I am fighting off the cold the girls have had since we arrived home and for a Spirit of healing and protection for Blake as we remove him from the protected walls of his orphanage and out into a germy world!  Also for a spirit of healing over both girls, especially Autum as we were in the emergency room Sunday night with no answers.  She seems to be doing better today after sleeping all day yesterday.  Also, for a Spirit of discernment and wisdom through the rest of this process.

We are blessed by so many of you who have held us up in prayer so far.  I have never felt covered by the Holy Spirit and the saints in prayer more in my life than now, so we are forever grateful to you for that.

I feel like Paul as he wrote to the church at Colosse and Phillipi:
      '" thank my God every time I remember you, in all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now..."

Next time you hear from me, I will have Blake in my arms, ready to head out the door forever!!

The Grey Area

Have I ever mentioned that I love our Sunday School class?

We have obviously been away from our church for nearly a month now so it felt SO good to be back in fellowship with our brothers and sisters in Christ.  Our class is currently studying Radical, by David Platz.  This book challenges everything in our culture that we have accepted as the 'norm' to the truths of the Bible.  It asks questions that cut to the core of our comforts and dreams. (the American dream, to be exact)  Anyway, we always seem to come back to the questions of: how much are you supposed to give?  how much are you supposed to save? 

What I appreciate most is that we can engage in discussion that is honest, raw, and open.  It may sting a little, it may not settle well with our hearts, but it is truth and it is needs to be spoken and heard.  Well, on this particular topic there has been lots of heated debate and opinions on what giving should look like.

We have concluded mostly that each person is called differently to give according to what they have--to give according to what they feel lead in their hearts by the Holy Spirit to give.  I have followed suit with this idea up until recently.  And I think, well, I am sure my heart has changed on this issue in response to my recent experiences in Ukraine.  I was not able to put to words my feelings about this today in class during our discussion, but as I have prayed over this idea all day I finally feel like my thoughts are beginning to form words.  Here is what I wished I could say:

"We are to give until it hurts a little."

--We are to give until we have to think.

--We are to give until we have to begin to ask questions about ourselves.

--We are to give until we have to make some serious decisions about our priorities.

--We are to give until other people begin to ask questions or comment about our giving.

--We are to give until we begin to see a change.

--We are to give until we feel it. 

--We are to give until we are affected.

--We are to give until we are changed.

 The need is too great.  The calling is clear.  Living in faith requires placing ourselves in a position to have to fully rely on Christ's power, promises, and strength to get us through.  To say that God is enough to fulfill my needs.  To let go of all that this temporary life on earth poses as 'worthy' and to begin to store up treasures in Heaven for eternity--knowing the reward is great.  

I am challenged by the faces of the little children pleading for me to be their 'momma' each day at the orphanage, I am challenged by the babushkas begging in the streets for bread, I am challenged by the teenage girl with a deformed leg, hobbling on a cane, stopping cars in a busy intersection pleading for a few coins to live on.

I plan to give until it hurts from now on, because it won't compare to the hurt these children, women, and girl's have experienced in their lifetimes already.  There may not be a step-by-step guide to how each of us is to give based on what we have...but what I do know is we can always give more and do more. 

It's tough.

It's not going to be easy.

It's not going to be popular.

It's going to hurt a little. 

Just in case you are missing him as much as I am.  Here's the little face that is the reward of so many people giving until it hurts, a life saved and many lives changed. 

Adoption Awareness Month: Getting your Hubby on Board

"I cannot believe we are standing right here, doing what we are doing, in this place, at this time...but I wouldn't want to be anywhere else..."

Those are the words that spilled out of my husband's mouth right before we walked into the court room to petition to be Blake's parents.  Those are the words that were said by a man who just 9 months before told me I was crazy for even thinking of there being a possibility of us adopting a child with special needs from a country halfway across the world.  Those are the words from a man who said there was no way we would be able to come up with enough money to adopt a child that far away.  Those are the words from a man who wouldn't even look at a Reece's Rainbow face or have given it a thought when I first became excited about it's mission.  Those are the words from a man who would roll his eyes when Leah and I would spend time reading through all the blogs of adopting families.

Keep in mind I am not making my husband out to be some monster that hates children.  He is quite the opposite, honestly.  What I'm trying to help you be aware of is that hearts can and do change for adoption.  As you have now seen in his case.  He is a living testament to this statement.  He was the biggest critic to my 'crazy, wild-hair idea.'  Keep in mind I have had a few share of those 'ideas' in my lifetime and he is always the realist who pulls my head out of the clouds.  But this time, I knew I was right, my heart was being tugged, and this was what we were supposed to do.

But what I want to share with you is...how I handled this Spirit-lead tug on my heart while Jerad's heart was being changed too. I often hear from women who feel they are lead to adopt as well, but who's husbands are no where near ready to adopt, or even want too.  So my contribution to November being National Adoption Awareness Month is:  How to get your Hubby on Board.

My first suggestion to help your husband's heart to change for adoption is:  Do nothing.
Ha! I bet you weren't expecting that.  I honestly did not say or do much to push the adoption idea on to Jerad, because knowing him and men in general, I knew that would backfire.  I showed him the Reece's Rainbow website and read to him a short snippet about a family who was in the journey to adopt.  That was it.  After that, I let it go as far as talking to him about it.

My second suggestion: Reach out to other adopting families.  Ask about their decision process to adopt.  In the meantime, I reached out to one particular adopting family, the Farley's.  Danielle, was VERY kind and immediately returned my email answering my questions and discussing her own husband's fear of International adoption as well.  She and I fasted and vowed to pray for one another and Jerad as much as we could over the next few weeks, in hopes God would slowly change his heart.  I told her that if Jerad did not agree to adoption, then I would know it wasn't possible right now, that the timing wasn't right.  That was going to be my answer.  Because nothing else was holding me up, but him.  Which was the most important part. :)

My third suggestion: Pray and Fast.  I honestly believe this whole journey has been nothing but an answer to the prayers of many.  I have never personally experienced the power of pray so clearly and powerfully in my own life.  So starting this journey out with prayer and fasting is crucial.  It is a great tool for drawing closer to Christ to understand His wisdom and to gain discernment, but it is great foundation for the strength you will need to draw on during the actual adoption process. Also, encourage a few close friends, or other adoptive families to pray with you for your husband.  The more people pounding on the doors of Heaven with prayer requests the better!

My fourth suggestion:  Become a Prayer Warrior.  Leah and I applied to be Prayer Warrior's for Reece's Rainbow.  This opened the door for she and I to have conversations about orphans, to pray for the children, and for us to grow a heart for adoption together.  This also provoked questions on her part, that she would often bring up when Jerad was around, that got us talking about adoption in a less-threatening environment.  Speaking of which, our little girl Nadine is still looking for a family.---->

My fifth suggestion: Do your Research.  If you do not feel your husband could handle a special need that may require extra attention, high medical costs, different housing arrangements, etc. then become educated on all the special needs that these children have and the requirements that go along with the child's need.  Since you know your husband the best and what he can 'bite off'...do not push children in his face that may just not be something he can handle.  Men already have enough apprehensions and fears about adopting children, let alone a child with special needs, so don't make the process even more complicated by trying to motivate him to love a child that he just might not be able to 'love.'  I had my eye on a child a long time before I found Blake and I would show his little face to Jerad a lot, but he would never really respond.  No emotional or verbal reaction.  Nothing.  So when I saw his interest in Blake, I was a bit disheartened at first, but I understood that Blake's special need was something he felt more comfortable with possibly living with.  So be prepared and educated as you research children, and as you know your husband, as to what child he may best be able to meet the needs of as a man of the house.

My sixth suggestion:  Be patient.  God's timing is perfect.  And you want to be restful in God's timing, otherwise you won't have peace about your journey to adopt.  So be patient, as you wait for your husband to come around.  It may take him time.  But be okay with that.  This gives you more time to pray, to prepare, and to plan for providing a home for a child.  This is a lesson you will have to learn and relearn through adoption.  And it doesn't get any easier, so begin to practice it now.  Your patience may just be what your husband needs to come around to his decision to adopt, because trust me, you will need each other in this journey.  So let him come to the decision on his own terms, not on yours.

If you are in this situation and you feel your husband may be the hold-up in your desire to adopt someday, please contact me or any other adopting mom--we all want would love to answer questions or help out in anyway we can.  I hope I can provide just a bit of the support shown to me by Danielle, in these beginning stages of trying to discern what is best for your family and spouse.