Potty Training 101

So this week I went to buy another box of $35 diapers and decided, I'm tired of buying them. We are done.  Time to take Blake's potty training more seriously.  I can do this...Ugh, yep! I am going to tackle this during Spring Break...we will be home, it's nice out.  What an adventurous way to spend the kid's 7 days off from school! Whoohoo!

I bought pull ups.  And Skittles. (and should have bought another bottle of wine--I always forget how crazy potty training makes me!)
But *sigh* this hopefully should be my last effort at this...

After buying the Skittles, Autum zeroed in on how she could possibly get one.
"You bought Skittles?"
"For me?"     No, Autum, these are for Blake to get when he potties in the toilet.
"Oh. I don't get one? None for me?"  I have a deal for you...when Blake potties in the toilet, you both get a Skittle...
"Ok! Ok!  Oh boy, Blake...you going potty in the toilet!"

This conversation took place on our drive home from the store...when we got in the driveway, Autum was squealing with excitement.  I unbuckled both of them from their carseats so they could scramble out of the van...meanwhile, I went to the back of the van to begin unloading groceries.  I heard Autum encouraging Blake to hurry up...and glanced around the van in time to see her dragging him up the porch stairs by the back of his hood on his sweatshirt...

I laughed to myself and let them be.  I had groceries to put away, anyway, they could fend for themselves for a few minutes.
I unloaded groceries for a minute and my mom instinct kicked in...I better go check on them because there was quite a bit of commotion going on upstairs...

I walked up the stairs and peered inside the bathroom door (hoping to observe a minute or two, before they saw me)--this was my plan, of course, unless I needed to take immediate measures...you just never know what you are going to walk into in these situations.

I had to keep from laughing out loud...as I witnessed this:
Blake was standing, stripped down to only his socks, on a pink stool in front of the toilet...Autum was standing behind him with her hands on his hips....yelling at him to hurry up and pee...
"DANGIT, Blake! GOOOO PEEEEE PEEEE!!!  This girl wants a Skittle!!!"

Hahahahhaa!
Then, Blake bends over looks at his little pee-pee, points at it and then points at the toilet and says, "Go! Go!"

Oh my word. So many thoughts.
I love her natural God-given ability to care for him, nurture him, AND that my ingenius plan to give them both a Skittle may.  just. work!  She will be his biggest cheerleader (even if it is for selfish gains)

FYI: He did go 2 times in the toilet by that afternoon and we had a big jumping, cheering, yelling, clapping, and dancing celebration.  And of course, handed out Skittles.

Weighing the Disasters...

This morning I realized how most of my days are spent choosing between 1 disaster or another, 1 mess or another, 1 temper tantrum or another, 1 discipline or another, 1 attention-needing scream or another...All. Day. Long!  My mind is going...going...going. 
I find myself asking these questions...

"Who's need is worse...hmmm, who which child is currently making the bigger mess?  Which child ate first last meal?  Which child is screaming louder?  Which child appears to be in worse harm/shape/pain/anger....fill in the blank.

For example, this morning...I had the 2 toddlers in their high chairs at the table. Leah was busy dipping her tiny apple pieces elbow deep into our 10 gallon jar of peanut butter, so the entire apple disappeared in creamy goodness, before she took a bite, and redipped.  All was good.  For a split second...Autum begins screaming..."I have to pee, I have to pee, I have to pee..."  She pushes herself away from the table and shimmies out of her chair and takes off running upstairs....yelling, "Mom! I need your help to wipe...Mooooooommmm..."  As she disappears....I knew she could get herself started, so I waited a minute or two...because in my mind I was already weighing the odds of who would make the worse mess in my absence...If I leave Leah and Blake...Leah will probably just start eating the peanut butter by the handful, skipping the apples...and Blake was nearly finished with his yogurt and toast...if he finishes before I get back...he will proceed to throw every kitchen utensil, crumb, and every remaining drop of his drink all over the floor, himself and the table...it's a given!  Every time!  BUT...if I wait too long on Autum she will unroll the entire roll of toilet paper in the bathroom upstairs and throw it in the toilet...and if she finishes that roll before I get there, she will get a new one within reach and begin unrolling it--there is a reason the toilet plunger sits right next to the toilet she frequents the most....so ultimately my choice came down to this: Clogged toilet, and -2 toilet paper rolls....OR...a milk, toast, butter, peanut butter, spoon-flinging mess in my kitchen...UGH...

Better go wipe Autum, hope she is done doing her business fast enough for me to wipe and run back downstairs before Blake finishes his last bite...and Leah runs out of apples..

Last night...same thing...
I had to choose between a flooded bathroom floor from Blake doing cannonballs into the tub...or Autum dumping flour all over the kitchen cabinet while she was trying to help me bake a cake...

Or...
Getting Blake out of his crib before he strips down naked and flings his diaper (while praying he hasn't pooped), takes his sheets and blankets off his mattress...or stop Leah from pouring her own cereal and an entire 1/2 gallon of almond milk all over the table...

Or...To load Blake on his side of the van (in a busy parking lot) while holding a 35# Autum in one arm, who provides no assistance to help you hold her...or put Autum on her side of the van and hold Blake while he rubs his snotty, booger nose all over my black peacoat, while wiggling and straining to get loose from your grasp to wave at every stranger who drives/walks by...

Or...to Let Autum ride in the car on the front of the grocery cart at the store and have to keep one arm on Blake in the basket as he continuosly tries to stand up and help you get items off the shelf...or let Blake ride in the car, have to keep one eye on him the entire time (as he is an escape artist) and listen to Autum scream in my ear about having to ride in the cart and not get to walk "like a big girl."  All while Leah begs to ride in the cart or car because her legs are sooooooo tired....

Or... load the kids in the van while it heats up in the morning...let them scream it out together in an enclosed space...knowing that Leah will have the radio blasting, windshield wipers going, and lights blinking/horn honking...Blake will have most likely pooped...just so I can get dressed and at least brush my teeth...OR...go to school in my PJ's, with bad breath, messy hair and untied shoes with no socks...and JUST PRAY I don't get pulled over or have to go into the school for any reason...

You see...?  All decisions.  Weighing the odds...the disasters, the noise level, the damages done...
All day.

Tough Kids. Tough Mom's

Man, I tell you what. This commercial hits the nail on the head.  In my experience with working with adults with special needs and in my own personal life with my own kids, hands down, people with developmental disabilities are the toughest people I know!  They have to fight for everything, day in and day out.  Physical therapy. Speech therapy. Occupational therapy.  Endless doctor's appointments. Lab draws. Med changes.  Psych evals. Extra classroom work. Physical pain. Emotional scars.

But you wouldn't know this.  Not from most.  Most of the people who live with these disabilities rarely see them as disabilities at all.  Most use what you and I see as a disability to be his/her motivation.  Inspiration.  Platform.  Desire.
They have heart.
Drive.
Work ethic.
Life.

I will not lie. There are days when I just WISH someone would live in my shoes.  Live with the struggles I deal with as a mom of 2 with special needs.  The pain.  The behaviors.  The inability to communicate.  The shortcomings.  The exhaustion.  The constant fight.  The sleepless nights.  Just wish people knew how tough life can be sometimes...it's not easy.  And not always fun.  There are lots of things we can't do as a family because of our family.  Places we won't go.  Experiences we won't have.

Yes, it is easy to let myself 'go there' with my thoughts.  To feel sorry. To feel bad.
But then I look around at my kids and the clients I work with, and realize they aren't slowing down to feel sorry for themselves.  To wish their life away for someone else's.  No. They are living it up.  Their way.  Each and every day.  They make that choice.

So should I.

So while this commercial gives credit to the tough mom's behind the toughest kids...which I think is amazing...not just any parent could do it.  I fully believe God knows what He is doing when He creates families. 

But...I feel like I am only tough through the daily inspiration of my tough kids and clients.  They make me stronger. 

For sure.






 

Evolution of Valentine's Cards

As I was digging out the Valentine's Day card I bought last week to give Jerad today, I ran across a pile of Valentine's Day cards.  We are the type of people who leave notes for each other randomly, exchange cards for different holidays/events...so I keep all of them.  In the past 10 years of marriage, I have collected quite a few.  With a few seconds to spare, the two little's watching Sesame Street and no where to have to run too...I decided to take a trip down memory lane and read through them. 

I found myself laughing at the evolution of the Valentine's Day cards over the years...

I'm guessing this first card I found was from our newlywed stage of marriage...and it says, "I love you" all over the front in different colors and angles.  And on the inside it says....well, I will leave that one alone...I know my grandma reads my blog. :)

What I'm thinking/guessing was one of my first Valentine's Day cards in our relationship (wishing now I had dated these)...I am pretty sure this card accompanied some flowers...It said "Happy Valentine's Day...this is Me..." (pic of a cute little cat holding a heart on front)  Inside said "...bringing you all the love my heart can hold!"  Jerad's chicken scratched message to me included a few things that tipped me off to this being early in our marriage...before kids.  "if you are not happy, I'm not happy...and that's why I would really like it if you could tell me when you are having trouble with something or upset with me..."

Probably a few years into our marriage. Leah was maybe a year or two old.  "My Wife, My Best Friend" written on the front..." I married my very best friend and I can't tell you how lucky that makes me feel." written on the inside.  Then Jerad wrote a personal note that said, "Here's to a romantic night...sometime when we can actually get away again, like we used too..."

And finally, I believe this last card was probably from the last year or two.  On the front it say, "For Valentine's Day, Tonight I'm going to let you have what you desire--ALL night long!"  And on the inside it says, "A full nights sleep with all the covers!"  AMEN! AMEN!  He didn't even have to write a personal message, he simply signed his name and said, "don't get used to it!"

Ah, the romanticism seeps through...but I honestly love it! I may not be a flowers and jewelry kind of girl, but having these cards to look through and smile, lets me relive all the past Valentine's Days whenever I choose.  And that to me is priceless.

Happy Valentine's Day!!